Thursday, February 16, 2012

Of Gauntlets In Roadways

Seamus Bayne is my good friend from Viable Paradise, and occasionally my therapist. Now we shall become more: brothers either in victory or humiliation.

Seamus and I have a large corpus of work sitting around that needs to get revised and Out. The. Damn. Door. Already. I have three short stories that I have been tweaking since time out of mind, and I still have not gotten them right. I have a Very Cool Novel that was supposed to be revised and out the door about the same time Sam was born. It is still not to third draft, even after some amazing critiques with many good point by Tina Connolly and Nikki Trionfo, both spectacular writers in their own right.

Seamus and I made a pact yesterday that the short stories would be out the door and the novels would be to beta readers within one month. March 15th is the day of destiny. If I do not, I must film myself dancing to Hot Chocolate's "I Believe In Miracles."

My wife describes my dancing thus: "it's like you hate your own body."

World, I have a sacred charge not to show you such a thing. Wish me the best of luck in avoiding it.

Thursday, February 2, 2012


I stole this from my friend Chas, and I love it. Take a famous poem and run it through an Internet translator three or four times, rendering it back into English, and then display the result. This is "Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night" through German and Spanish. The parantheses are amazing. They add this weird level of after-the-fact whispering.

Go carefully to this good night not,
The age should burn and be furious(storm) towards the end of the day;
The anger (the feeling), you are furious(storm) in the death in the light.

Though wise men (husbands) know (know) to his(her,your) (his(her,your)) end(final) mysteriously (they know (they know)), it(he) is correct,
Since his(her,your) (his(her,your)) words had not bifurcated on they no go (it)
Do not go carefully to this good night.

Good men (husbands), the last wave (wave) for, as intensely shouts
His(Her,Your) (His(Her,Your)) fragile acts might have danced in a green bay,
The anger (the feeling), you are furious(storm) in the death in the light.

The wild men (the husbands) who reached and sang the Sun in the flight,
And learn very late, they it saddened on his(her,your) (his(her,your))(she(it)) the way,
Do not go carefully to this good night.

Serious men (husbands), closing the death that it(he,she) sees with the screens of the sight
Blind eyes might burn on since(as,like) meteorites (and to be homosexuals) happy,
The anger